By Wale Ojo-Lanre
Walai talai! It is by the whiskers and grace of Allah!! I never knew it was a grand plan!!! Just thank Almighty Allah for me and in my behalf.
Wednesday, April 6, 2022, will ever remain evergreen and permanently engraved in the metal plate of my big medulla oblongata!
It was a day that I escaped from Senator Rasheed Adewolu Ladoja, former governor of Oyo State and the Otun of Olubadan if Ibadanland, and his wife, Barrister Yinka Ladoja.
I don’t know your perception of Senator Ladoja and his wife; but, I am sure whatever perception you might have will change a little bit by the time you finished reading this account of how I escaped hale and hearty from their house.
However, I thank God that I have parents who installed in me the necessary defence mechanism strong enough to wade off all covetous instincts and greedy tendencies, which a typical countryside boy sometimes always develops when acclimatizing to the city’s life nuances.
If not, by now I should either be attended to or be mishandled by some negligent officials of the University Teaching Hospital Ibadan, UCH, as a result of the therapy meted out to me and my friends, Yinka Awoyinka and Ajibade, by the Ladojas in their modest house, located on Ondo Street, Old Bodija, Ibadan, Oyo State, Nigeria.
And this will serve as a warning signal to others who might wish or planning to visit Chief Ladoja and his pleasant wife, particularly around 7 pm – 9 pm.
Honestly, I do not dislike Chief Ladoja, Allah sees my heart.
How can I hate such a man of integrity?
I have never planned any evil against him and any member of his household. So I was taken aback, and wondered why it should be me that Chief Ladoja and his wife should hack a plan against!
But I am grateful to Allah, the most Beneficent and the Merciful for ensuring that I escaped sound and hearty.
For there is no reason why Baba Ladoja should hate me. I am just a harmless journalist who cannot harm a fly. A grandson of an ‘iru’ (locust bean) seller from Usi Ekiti, who only knows how to eat pounded yam.
And I too have no reason to hate him or despise his person. After all, he has not made any move to lure Moyo away from me.
In fact, how should I hate a man who out of the lots stood his ground by standing solidly by the truth, when others were cajoled, intimidated to submission and capsized to do a wrong?
Why should I make Baba Ladoja an enemy when he tarred the road from Orita Challenge to Ashipa village, when he was the governor since then the road has been crying for rehabilitation? Why should I constitute myself as a foe to a man who is very rich, but who adopted a very simple way of living?
A man who has adopted common Ankara as his official dress, and not the expensive glamorous Swiss imported materials or expensive guinea brocade from Senegal!
A man who has the money to acquire the most glamorous and gold plated phone in this world, but will strictly buy a less than a hundred thousand naira functional phone.
It is this and his other impressive simple approach to worldly ways that emboldened me to lead two other friends of mine to his house on that particular Wednesday, unaware that a plot was on against me.
I never suspected the plot even when my appointment was scheduled for 7 pm!
My struggle of getting to his house at 7 pm that day was botched by a traffic hold up, which usually rears its head between the hour of 6 and 7 pm every day now in Ibadan for the past 8 days.
I finally got to his house at 7:30 pm and saw a large number of people outside being served ‘olele, eko and pure water. (Olele is the name for min moin in Usi dialect)
As they were engaging in pushing the stuff down their throats, some of them were praying for ‘Baba Ladoja, for providing food and water for us since the beginning of this fasting period.
‘You will live long. You will not encounter the suffering of the earth. You and your family will not die miserable and hungry. None of yours will ever taste hunger or suffer want of food and drink anytime any day. The Almighty Allah will because of what you are doing for us accept all your supplications to him.’
At this point, I was joined by my friends, who have been waiting for me.
Entry to the house was devoid of any serious protocol. We were ushered into a not-less aristocratic sitting room that is linked to a long dining room.
A sitting room already occupied by distinguished and eminent Nigerians from different parties, yes, I saw prominent members of the Peoples Democratic Party, PDP, the All Progressives Congress, APC, and the Social Democratic Party, SDP; all waiting to see Senator Ladoja.
Yet, I never had an inkling of the plot against me.
As he emerged from a door adjacent to the sitting room, Senator Ladoja moved around and gave each of us a knuckle greeting and without sitting down, went straight to plant himself on the top chair of the dining table.
At his invitation, we joined him. By now my mind started to work well…to break the fast with him…huh!! ‘Not a big deal,’ I said in my mind.
Is it not just a matter of eko and olele (moin moin)?
But I got it wrong!
Breaking fast with Senator Ladoja is not a small and simple thing!!
We started with fruits, namely, orange, banana, grape, watermelon, apple, pineapple and others.
Not having these fruits for long, I started tasting each and every one of them.
As the fruits were dealt with and remnants packed off the table, Anti Yinka came in with pap and real olele wrapped inside ewe ‘iran’ (moin moin).
The olele is of seven ingredients – elemi meje. And not minding that those who are sick are the one who always drink pap in Ekiti, I added enough honey into mine, got hold of three wraps of olele, and walked them down the throat.
At this juncture, I was filled to the brim and thought that was all.
So I raised some posers. As Baba Ladoja was about to respond to the posers, Anti Yinka came in and stocked the table with bowls of fried rice, amala, jollof rice, white rice spaghetti, beans, pounded yam, fufu, two coolers full of various brands of meats, ‘orisirisi, fuku, edo, saki,’ goat meat, chicken, turkey, ‘ponmo’ that has been sandwiched inside the stew, dry fish!
Having greedily consumed the first two tranches of meals, the fruit and olele with pap, there was no vacancy inside my belly to add any other items
As other guests were serving themselves, Senator Ladoja looked at me!
‘Lanre, amala or iyan?’
Then the plot now dawned on me…ok…ok..ok…I was invited here to be overfed
As I was fidgeting to respond to Senstor Ladoja, Barrister Yinka Ladoja appeared with a plate in her hand, put a pounded yam and an amala and asked me to choose one.
Oh! Great plot…I can see this great family planned to stuff out my life with nice, delicious and tasty food? (Nwon fe fi ounje pa mi)!
Then I quickly borrowed myself sense! How can I escape this clever plot?
Realizing that there was not enough space to load any of these into my belly; I quickly reasoned a way out – go for rice.
I opted for jollof rice, a few orisirisi and stylishly acted as if I was eating the food.
Then I raised questions:
Sir…..
And Sir…
And Sir…
Just like that…
Others joined in the discussion
Attention was shifted from me and diverted to the topics! I signalled to one of the maids in the house, who packed the plate in front of me
As the plate was packed away unnoticed; inside me, I rejoiced and jumped up in joy
Allah is the glory !!
I have escaped the evil plan of being overfed at the home of Senator Adewolu Rasheed Ladoja on Wednesday, 6th day of April 2022.
Special thanks to Barrister Yinka Ladoja for such an awesome, delicious variety of meals!
May the Almighty Allah accept, sign, seal and stamp all the prayers offered for the Ladojas family by those who were eating and breaking their fast outside the gate of his house that night.
So be prepared if and whenever Senator Ladoja gives you an appointment, particularly between the hours of 7 and 9 pm during this fasting period, it may be a plan to over pamper you.
Pray for Allah’s mercy to escape as I did.
Ya Ramadan Kareem!
Ha! Ha!! Ha!! Haaa!
Come to Usi Ekiti and beat me…
•Ojo-Lanre writes from
Usi – Ekiti in Ekiti State,
Nigeria.
